August 2008
18 posts
girlfriend update
me: so are you going to marry her?
noah: i don’t know yet.
2nd week of kindergarten and noah has a...
noah comes home from school: did you know i have a girlfriend? me: no! really? noah: uh-huh. me: how did that happen?? noah: *looks away like…. -i have to explain everything to this woman-*
i fell in love. me: you DID? with who? noah: i don’t know her name. me: what does see look like? noah: she has a blue bow, dark hair, and skin like me. me: what made you...
can i whisper something?
i’m really, really tired.
i’m getting lots of sleep. but i’m really tired now. just overwhelmed tired. my grandpa won’t die (which sounds terrible i know-but he’s miserable right now and not going out peacefully in the least). my kid is autistic. and what the F does that mean anyway?
sorry, i stopped whispering.
*sigh*
ok, i guess what i’m trying...
butterflies...*shudder*...i don't even like the...
so basically- i took a prescription sleeping aid* after my foot surgery and surprise, surprise- i was sensitive to it. ron said, “let’s add it to the list.”, because i’m allergic to or have odd reactions to all sorts of things anyway.
the reaction i had from this however was insane. i had crazy hallucinations about butterfly-covered sea worms swimming at my face. i knew...
“there is some real beauty along the way… but of course, it is a long road,...”
– comments from the 2007 US Autism and Asperger Association Conf.
mais, thibodeaux...go cook you some rice.
only cajun people would eat crap named ‘debris’.
Definitions of Debris on the Web:
Debris is a word used to describe the remains of something that has been otherwise destroyed.
soft foreign matter loosely attached to the surface of the tooth
Non- biological particulate such as dirt or soot.
(n.): remains.
carelessly discarded refuse
Scattered, old remains of plants and...
j and n
so today was the day to drop off school supplies and meet the teachers. i don’t always worry so much about my kids teacher as i do the asstard parents who may have kids in my kid’s class.
if you think i’m being crazy/mean: while i was waiting to speak to the school counselor- a mom with her little ‘angel’ was yelling at the school secretary, “he ain’t...
no me gusta
for the last week or so, google is insisting i speak german or spanish. i change it back to english every single time, and every single time google switches right on back. i can only search in spanish. and it loads every page in german.
son of a whore.
or
hijo de una punta.
(i do not know how to say it in german. give me one more week with google.)
(i do know how to say, ‘fick...
i should have gone into politics.
going through my old saved letters, i came across one my mom saved from 1988- age 10, 5th grade. here it is, quoted exactly: Dear Mom, I have seen my report card. I konw my conduct is an F. But, I have brought up my grades in 4 things, but they have gone down in three things. I have an F because I am never on task, because I already know how to do this. I get bored and I go on to the next...
burning up with seals
me: omg i have to confess this. i actually really like that new jonas brothers song.
what the hell?? and ewwwww. seal penis?
and nice to have the jonas brothers and seal penis spoken in the same breath.
beauty
what is beautiful? it’s something that i’ve been thinking a lot about lately. i’m not sure if it’s maturity or what, but i’ve come to believe that beauty isn’t something you feel, it’s something you possess. feelings are circumstancial. beauty isn’t.
perhaps i am not pretty in what some call the ‘ideal’… but i have no...
it's bittersweet
i know that very, very soon (or at least i assume? who knows really?) my grandpa will die.
he made it through today, and made it through his surgery. it amazes me that for every time we’ve been told by some doctor that ‘he won’t make it’, the old man just keeps on kicking.
but soon, i know, and we all know, he won’t be able to keep it up. in many ways i wish him...
i'm really crappy at feeling like shit.
feeling bad is not something i do well. it’s just not in me.
today is just a shit of a day. i am literally buying time while waiting for a phone call to tell me whether my grandpa is dead or not. i want to be alone. but i’m not. i want to give into feeling like crap- but i can’t.
i mean, i feel ucky, yes, but it’s so purposeless.
i used to be the sort who freaked...
JUST FYI
JACK VALENTI:
NOT JACK VALENTI:
saturday and elephants
“you have the vagina of a 14 year old. even when you’re 80 it’ll look like a 14 year old’s. you’ll spread your legs and angels will sing.”
this is the weirdest compliment i’ve ever received from another woman. it totally tops: “you have the smallest, tightest ass i’ve ever seen.” (told to me from a random stranger in a church- yes,...
sushi, no, eel, ?
was asked out for sushi.
i’m not fond of it. i’ve tried it.
i like fish. i even like raw fish. i just don’t like fish that taste fishy. i’m picky about my fish… i’m fish spoiled i guess.
so anyway, the evening starts with a traditional canadian brewed japanese beer (uh-huh…) which was nearly a mistake as i hadn’t eaten ANYTHING all day. so...
intriguing
We see a great many things and can remember a great many things, but that is different. We get very few of the true images in our heads of the kind I’m talking about, the kind that become more and more vivid for us as if the passage of the years did not obscure their reality,...